The Horror of Heaven

When I was a very little kid I could actually scare the hell out of myself just by contemplating heaven. I was terrified not of hell but of that Pie in the Sky Christer paradise. I would willfully contemplate eternity, never-ending life in heaven, and repeat the word “forever” over and over until I was literally frozen in horror at the idea of ceaseless existence, no matter how happy, in a city of gold and light and endless celebration: billions upon billions of aeons crawling by with no end, no terminus (and no point) in sight.